Thanksgiving has become my favorite holiday. Though it too has become the victim of our insatiable appetite to turn all traditions into mass marketing events, it still remains more focused on feasting with family and friends.
I love the story behind Thanksgiving. A small band of desperate people from one continent made their way to another in search of a better life. They were met with a mix of curiosity, fear, distrust, resentment, scorn, and, amazingly enough, hospitality. This story has been unfolding for a decade short of four hundred years now.
The cultural barriers back then were immense. Different nearly everything: languages, theologies about a Creator-God, customs, living accommodations, food preferences, recreation, and on and on. The miracle of Thanksgiving is that in spite of these profound differences, two very different cultures came together to celebrate the fall harvest and give thanks that they had survived a very difficult year together.
Today we struggle with the same challenges. We are a nation divided over many differences in language, theologies about a divine being, customs and traditions, living accommodations, food preferences, recreation, and on and on.
We focus too much on how we are different from one another. We focus too little on how we are all in this country together. All of us have arrived here from somewhere else. Even those we know as Native Americans descend from ancient people who first discovered this continent. Every one of us descends from people who risked their lives to settle in this land we call America. We are heirs of the choices made by these ancestors. Some of our ancestors chose to come here very recently. Some a generation or two ago. Some several hundred years ago. And some too far back to know. We, their descendents, will either move forward together or go down together.
Thanksgiving is a perfect time to hit the "pause" button of our lives together in the grand land. We need to stop hurling insults and accusations at one another and look around at the opportunities and blessings we have today because of what our ancestors risked in their day.
Though we are challenged with problems large and small, we are blessed with people who quietly go out to do what they can to make a positive impact. Thousands of our citizens volunteer every day in a rich variety of ways. Let's give thanks for them and follow their lead.
Bill goes out to pick up trash and paint fences. He's in his late 70's. He could just stay home and watch football all day, but he doesn't. Rochelle joins a small team of volunteers to provide a warm meal and a safe haven for homeless teenagers.
Ron tutors high school students, encouraging them to stay in school until they graduate. Beverly takes her dog to a rehab center where the dog cajoles physically handicapped people into learning how to adjust to life minus one or more limbs. Norm and his family spend part of Thanksgiving Day distributing warm clothing to the homeless of our city.
Let's stop the criticizing and attacking. Let's focus on what we have in common. Let's talk about all the reasons we have to give thanks and all the opportunities before us. Let's do what our ancestors did years ago-take time off from our worries and fears to feast and celebrate.
In an effort to be relevant in the current century I'm trying to learn the ins and outs of internet life. It's not going well. I'm trying to put my negativity aside and remember that once upon a time reading in any format was a new skill. I'd like to think my ancestors were on the cutting edge of this new wave of communicating via funny little squiggles on cave or tablets of clay. More likely I descend from the less enthusiastic members of society. I picture a frustrated great to the hundredth plus degree grandmother standing there with her hands on her hips talking to herself--because her mate who loved all the new squiggles-- left to go do an errand-proud that he'd left a message saying so. "Why can't we just talk! like other people do? I don't want to learn what all those squiggles and dots mean. Talk to me!" And so began the great miscommunication cycle that continues to the present high-tech age.
So, another century, another new skill to master. I know more than I used to know. I know far less than I need to know. If I can't beat the system, I guess I'll have to learn more about it. That led to a phone class on how to use social networking to my best writing advantage. That led to the suggestion that I need a niche. Really? I do?
I've been trying to figure out what my niche might be. I haven't figured it out yet. I think my niche is to remain niche-less in a world that wants us to live on ten second sound-bites and headlines flashing before us all day long on computer screens. I'm not going to throw away the computer-yet. And I'll keep learning new tricks-slowly. But for right now, I think my niche is that I don't have one.
I realize this may put me at a disadvantage. But surely I can't be the only person on the planet who doesn't have a niche. Maybe we could start a twelve step program for the niche-less. I can hear it now. "Hello. My name is Kathy and I don't have a niche."
Two years ago this very day I and John were married in a fun-filled day filled with family and friends. Four days ago that marriage ended in what is charitably known as an amicable divorce. It was my idea and I'm not going explain any of it in such a public forum.
What I am going to write about is how we took time yesterday to try to bring closure to this amazing whirlwind two year adventure. The first challenge was waiting until we were both calm and rested. We'd tried a day earlier and let's just leave it at, it wasn't my proudest hour. The next challenge was finding a quiet neutral place to have the conversation. It took four tries. Why do restaurants think we want music blaring at us when we're trying to talk to someone? But on the fourth try we lucked out and found a quiet corner in the lounge of a Hilton overlooking a beautiful view of the Clear Lake. The waitress who kept us supplied with wine and water (it was after all near 100 degrees outside) referred to the corner in which we parked ourselves "the cave."
In retrospect, that seemed fitting enough. We're both trying to come out of a cave of confusion and transitions. We had a long philosophical conversation about how come it is that something can seem like such a good idea at the time and then end up not being such a great idea later. And, what does all this mean?
Well for the moment it means John is returning to his beloved Australia and I am staying here in Houston for a while to honor work commitments I've made. I also have the time now to figure out which of the many paths before me might be the best one to take. My track record for making good decisions about options hasn't been all that great so far this millennium. No complaints. I have been blessed with some terrific experiences and opportunities. If it's true that practice makes perfect, I'm about due for a string of "A plus" decisions. I've certainly practiced enough in the "make up your mind" department since the global odometer turned 2000 years a while back. I DO make up my mind. It's just that other people and circumstances show up that weren't part of the original equation. That results in making some different decision. As one author I'm reading sums it up, "Life is just one thing after another."
For what it's worth (warning: probably not much), here are conclusions from this chapter of life:
* It's possible to be both very clear and totally confused about the same situation at the same time.
* It's possible to both really care about someone and really not be able to live happily ever after with that person.
*I'm not so sure it's true that God helps those who help themselves. However, I am quite confident that God does help those in need-and usually in the most amazing and unpredictable ways.
*Sometimes we hear just exactly what it was we needed to hear from the lips of total strangers who have no idea they're saying anything significant or timely.
*The Girl Scouts got it right. Make new friends, but keep the old. One is silver, the other gold.
*This too shall pass.
*Life is short. Enjoy the sweet parts and try not to take out the sour parts on other people. They no doubt have their own challenges to manage.
*As a retired bishop friend of mine put it at his retirement party, "For all that has been, 'thank God.' For what is yet to come, 'Yes.'"
Any credible writing coach who attempts to teach others how to write will sooner or later insist the best way to learn how to write is to. . . drum roll please . .. .write. Writers write.
It sounds simple. Sometimes it is. The words just fly through the finger tips onto the blank page or screen.
Other days, not so much. No fresh ideas are forthcoming. Or the ideas that do appear seem truly stupid and worthless. Or they make the author of them way too vulnerable and so never see the light of print. On days like that writing is lonely and challenging work.
Plus, the print publishing world is undergoing a gigantic shift right now. Few and far between are those who really know what the future holds. Some predict the worlds of printed magazines, newspaper, and books are coming to a close. These may go the way of the clay tablets or parchment scrolls. They will become rare items housed in private collections and public museums. Oh how I fervently hope those who predict such things are wrong.
We can't deny the advent of the internet has certainly impacted the way we get our information and amuse ourselves. With such dire predictions about the future of the printed word it's tempting to give up writing all together. Or switch from writing that slowly develops a plot and characters to the fast-moving world of headline texting with made up shorthand words.
I recently read about a teacher who makes students rewrite any papers handed in using less than standard approved English words that appear in dictionaries. I read this in a print newspaper. I suppose some will take this teacher to task for being so old-fashioned. I for one hope the teacher is able to hold students to that standard.
The development of human language fascinates me. I like researching the origin of words and phrases. I realize language is fluid and does change from generation to generation. Shakespeare is still read and his plays are still produced in theatres around the world. The classics last and last. However, it's a tad difficult to read them without some help translating the meaning of those ancient words.
It is such a privilege to have the skill to both read and write. It is a privilege denied many. It seems to me those of us who have had the good fortune to be born into families and communities where teaching such skills was important have an obligation. I believe we have an obligation to use the words carefully. We ought to use this incredible ability to encourage, inspire, educate and help them others.
We ought to refrain from using the written word to abuse, deceive, mislead, or assault others.
Words are powerful. May those of us who have the ability to write and read them use them wisely.
Any credible writing coach who attempts to teach others how to write will sooner or later insist the best way to learn how to write is to. . . drum roll please . .. .write. Writers write.
It sounds simple. Sometimes it is. The words just fly through the finger tips onto the blank page or screen.
Other days, not so much. No fresh ideas are forthcoming. Or the ideas that do appear seem truly stupid and worthless. Or they make the author of them way too vulnerable and so never see the light of print. On days like that writing is lonely and challenging work.
Plus, the print publishing world is undergoing a gigantic shift right now. Few and far between are those who really know what the future holds. Some predict the worlds of printed magazines, newspaper, and books are coming to a close. These may go the way of the clay tablets or parchment scrolls. They will become rare items housed in private collections and public museums. Oh how I fervently hope those who predict such things are wrong.
We can't deny the advent of the internet has certainly impacted the way we get our information and amuse ourselves. With such dire predictions about the future of the printed word it's tempting to give up writing all together. Or switch from writing that slowly develops a plot and characters to the fast-moving world of headline texting with made up shorthand words.
I recently read about a teacher who makes students rewrite any papers handed in using less than standard approved English words that appear in dictionaries. I read this in a print newspaper. I suppose some will take this teacher to task for being so old-fashioned. I for one hope the teacher is able to hold students to that standard.
The development of human language fascinates me. I like researching the origin of words and phrases. I realize language is fluid and does change from generation to generation. Shakespeare is still read and his plays are still produced in theatres around the world. The classics last and last. However, it's a tad difficult to read them without some help translating the meaning of those ancient words.
It is such a privilege to have the skill to both read and write. It is a privilege denied many. It seems to me those of us who have had the good fortune to be born into families and communities where teaching such skills was important have an obligation. I believe we have an obligation to use the words carefully. We ought to use this incredible ability to encourage, inspire, educate and help them others.
We ought to refrain from using the written word to abuse, deceive, mislead, or assault others.
Words are powerful. May those of us who have the ability to write and read them use them wisely.
Writer's Blog and Other Challenges of Communications in the 21st Century
Apparently the world keeps sub-dividing into two camps: those who eagerly and easily embrace changes and those who don't. There may be a third camp consisting of those who hang around more or less in the middle waiting to see if it's a fad or a permanent change. Once it seems that the change is permanent they eventually wander over to the embrace change camp side.
For example, I read somewhere (I have no idea where or I'd gladly give credit to the source) that when the automobile was first introduced someone said, "Interesting invention. But it'll never catch on. The noise will frighten the horses too much."
I also heard that when the concept of electric lighting was first introduced some feared having wires in the walls of a home would be a fire hazard. It turns out they were right, but it's a very small hazard if the wiring is properly installed and periodically inspected. I guess some insurance company would know the risk of fire from electrical wiring compared to using candlelight everywhere or smoking in bed.
So here we are now in the second decade of the 21st century and a new millennium. The internet has taken over as the most convenient means of mass communication. On the up side, it's brought together millions of people who would otherwise never cross paths with one another. It's fueled revolutions and election campaigns. It has re-connected college and childhood friends and long-long cousins. It's generated a whole new field of IT specialists who actually seem to comprehend how this all works and can make computers behave.
I think it's too early to know if this communications revolution has a down side or not. However, it does seem we're spending more time looking at digital screens of various sizes and less time looking into faces of other humans. The internet revolution is going change the world of print media more than the printing press did. In fact, quite a few knowledgeable people believe it will be the death knoll for printed media.
I for one earnestly pray this is not so. I would really miss the simple pleasure of sitting curled up on the coach or stretched out on a beach chair with a great book or magazine in hand. Or snuggled up with a small child reading a bedtime story. But then those who thought the new-fangled cars would frighten the horses probably didn't want to give up the relationship they had with their favorite horses. Those who feared the destructive potential of electrical wiring in homes probably didn't want to give up the soft glow of candlelight evenings.
Maybe there's room for some old-fashioned compromise here. Many people still have horses. They just don't use them to pull the carriage into town to shop any more. Many couples still dine in person in the soft glow of candlelight. Maybe we can still figure out to have our books, magazines and papers along with blogs, e-mails and webinars.
One of the few things we can count on in life is change. Whether we love it or hate it; embrace it or resist it, change is a force that cannot be stopped.
We seem to be nation that is dividing. Red States vs. Blue States. Republicans vs. Democrats. Insured vs. Uninsured or Underinsured. Perhaps this isn't as negative a thing as some are predicting. Don't organisms grow through the process of their cells dividing?
Yesterday President Barack Obama signed into law a health care reform bill. Getting something done about health care had been on the agenda of presidents back a hundred years. Depending on which news source one listened to or read, this was either a great day in U.S. history or the beginning of the end of life as we've known it in the States. Some states are already threatening to bring a law suit against the Federal Government. Texas, the state in which I reside, is one of them.
This grieves me greatly. Whether we agree or disagree with the details of the bill, it saddens me that we've become a nation of sore losers. What happened to our sense of sportsmanship? What happened to the idea of free speech for all? How can we ever justify throwing bricks and barbs at those who hold an opinion differing from our own? How can any one be so absolutely sure that they, and they alone, hold the self-evident truth?
Yet, I do not dispair. I realize no good deed goes unpunished. Trying to insure the rest of us have health insurance coverage seems to me a good deed. I know no social change worth making was accomplished without great effort--too often up to and including the loss of life. I pray no lives will be lost by senseless violence by those who didn't get their way. I rejoice that perhaps fewer lives will be lost needlessly now that more health insurance is available to more people.
Change is a funny concept. Even the very word "change" is a controversial one these days thanks to the campaign slogan of the current President. Sometimes we long for some changes. When we're children we want to be teenagers. When we've arrived at adolescence we want to be adults. When we're young adults we want to be older adults. Somewhere around the 40 to 50 year time frame we want to stop the advance of years and revert back to the ages we couldn't wait to grow through.
When we're bored with--pick an item--any item--our job, or car, our home, our family--we want change. We want to trade in the old one for a more exciting new one. But let someone else impose a change that wasn't our idea, and we're all about stopping the changes. "Don't they dare build that in my neighborhood!" "You can't tell me what to do" becomes the battle cry of those who object to social changes ranging from wearing seat belts and helmits to restricting where smokers may smoke.
We seem to like change when the change was our idea and we benefit from it. We dread and block changes that were someone else's idea and won't directly benefit us. Or at least, we don't see how the change will ultimately benefit us.
Well , it was indeed an historic day. The signing of the bill was accomplished with much fanfare and high fiving among those got it done. And much derision and protesting--and me thinks not a small amount of sour graping--on the part of those who had tried to block it. And are still trying to do so.
The future remains an unknown mystery. But for this moment in time, here's to your good health--all of you who will now have coverage or who can extend your coverage under your parents' plans, and to you small business owners who can more readily afford to include some level of health insurance coverage for your employees.
America, here's to our collective health. May we keep focused on the principles on which we founded this great nation--equal justice for all of us--the pursuit of happiness for all of us--equal opportunities for all of us. We don't have to agree. We can't possibly agree on every issue. Perhaps we could agree to disagree with a bit more civility and charity towards those with whom we disagree. That might improve everyone's overall health.
This too shall pass. And when it does, may our children and grandchildren be proud of how we participated in the process.
Cheers.
Start wherever you are. Use whatever you have. Do whatever you can.
Folks in the States ask me a lot of questions about what it's like in Australia, aka "Down Under," aka "Oz." The short answer is, "wonderful." This is a terrific country. Here's a short description.
Land size: About the same as the 48 lower United States.
Population: About the same as either Texas or Southern California-i.e., around 20 million and growing.
Government: Based on the British system, modified over the years; it is a parliamentary government headed by a Prime Minister. The current one is Kevin Rudd. Last night he was a guest on a local news-based combination quiz/comedy show. The questions were rigged in his favor, so he had to win. But it was very informative and entertaining none-the-less. Australia has a much smaller number of states, all large in size, each with a major city and a state Prime Minister. They are:
Queensland (Brisbane)
New South Wales (Sydney)
Victoria (Melbourne)
South Australia (Adelaide)
Western Australia (Perth)
And Northern Territory (Darwin) ---it's not a state. It's a territory.
The Capital of Australia is Canberra, located in the A.C.T (Australian Capital Territory), much as Washington is in DC, the District of Columbia.
There are some other islands officially connected to Australia too, but this is enough for one posting.
Living in Australia is much like living in the States. When Australians say "America," they generally mean the United States. I prefer to refer to the States as the States since "America" includes many other countries.
It's hard to find an edition of the daily Australian news that doesn't include a story about President Obama and often some other key US figure as well.
Most US movies play in Australia within a few days after opening in the States.
The majority of the population lives in one of the urban centers listed above, but there are many, many smaller communities. Most of these are located within a few miles of the coast. By the second half of the 19th century a higher percentage of Australians lived in towns of 2,500 or more than the people living in England or the States.
The time difference between Brisbane and Houston is 16 hours. So to figure out when to call folks back in Texas, I've learned to count forward eight hours and skip back a day. If they want to call me they have to count back eight hours and fast forward a day. Mid-morning Tuesday in Australia is dinner time on Monday in Texas.
My personal greatest challenge is driving. They use the left side of the road. On multiple lane highways I'm driving in what feels like it should be the passing lane. Nearly all exits are to the left. The steering wheel is on the right side of the car. This works out OK for an automatic. It is definitely weird driving a stick shift. On a good day I get the turn signal on the first try. Usually I turn on the windshield wipers first. These are located on opposite sides of the steering column from cars driven in the States.
Australians love round-a-bouts. They have them in every little village and in many intersections in major cities. And they go around them clockwise instead of counter clock wise as folks to in the States do in the rare places that have them.
Seasons are reversed. Christmas is always hot, occurring in the middle of summer as it does. Lent and Easter are in the fall, so all the imagery of spring and new life doesn't really match the reality of what folks are experiencing. However, this does not preclude an abundance of Easter candy available everywhere.
Enough for one day. If you've read all this, "good on you" as they'd say Down Under.
G'day for now.
Start wherever you are. Use whatever you have. Do whatever good you can. In spite of all the constant stream of bad news, it's still a wonderful world filled with terrific people and fascinating places to go and things to see.
Kangaroo Island, off the southern coast of Australia, is one of those rare places left on the planet where the animals outnumber the people. Paved roads are few and wildlife is abundant. In a period of only a few days we saw a couple of koalas hanging out in the eucalyptus trees; an echidna just strolling along the side of the road; hundreds of seals; a few penguins; more birds than we could count; and two wallabies in the wild. There were a lot more, but they hide out in the shade during the day and we weren't allowed to drive after sunset. There is also a farm managed by a man who takes in whatever wildlife survives too close encounters with cars, people, or other injury inducing events. There we spent several hours with an alpaca (definitely not my favorite animals as they spit often and randomly); many, many kangaroos in various sizes, several emus, including a couple of very young ones, and other critters.
I think the highlight was watching Farmer Paul sheer one of the sheep for us in such a way that it came off in one large piece. The poor de-fleeced sheep didn't much appreciate the experience, but the humans all found it fascinating. We also all got a turn to hold a koala as long as it took for the appropriate photo ops. They snuggle into the arms of whoever wants to hold them, but they have very sharp claws. It's a two-person operation to remove them when that time comes.
This is the month we celebrate Valentine's Day. It is ironic that we've turned the life of a Valentine, a priest in the early church, into another major spending spree for candy and cards and flowers and dinners out. Though I'm sure it's good for the economy, it totally misses the point. The original point was that men were being drafted to fight wars for the Romans. Many died in the process. The only escape route from involuntary military service was to be married. That would get the newlywed soldier a one-year deferment. Those clever Roman rulers figured out men were getting married to avoid the draft and closed that loop hole. Fighting age men were forbidden to marry when that would get in the way of their military obligations. Priest Valentine, at great risk to his personal safety, married couples anyway. For his efforts he landed in jail.
The connection between the wildlife on Kangaroo Island and Valentine of ancient Rome is this: the world works best when we respect one another's environments and grant each other respect sufficient to let each person define for themselves who and what they wish to be. If we could really ever actually grasp this concept I think we wouldn't need a military force and we could do away with endangered species lists.
It's a thought. Meanwhile, I guess the economy could use the boost of a few more cards, chocolates, and flowers sold. I suppose I'll do my fair share to contribute to the sales.